For anyone that may be confused...
I published the previous blog on Nov. 12. Some of you got to see it before I decided that I seemed to be complaining too much, and I pulled it back. Apparently it was inspiring, so I have decided to re-publish, but post this follow-up with it.
I don't mean to complain. I feel very fortunate to have a job in an economy in which many are finding themselves without. I feel very fortunate to be married to a wonderful man that I hug and kiss every day. I feel very fortunate to live close enough to family that I can easily visit when I can.
Perhaps a better explaination of my feelings...
I feel like I am wasting time. We are all given a certain amount of time on this earth. Time that I believe we are meant to use to make a contribution. I'm not really sure what my contribution is meant to be, but I don't feel like right now, I am contributing in that way.
I know I should be spending more time with my children, raising them so that they become respectful, loving, giving, understanding, and contributing adults.
I think I should be helping other children, providing them with resources so that they become respectful, loving, giving, understanding, and contributing adults.
Perhaps I should be helping adults, providing them with resources so that they become and can raise their own children to become respectful, loving, giving, understanding, and contributing adults.
Maybe I should be devoting my time to those that need help, just getting to the doctor, getting groceries, cleaning, cooking, helping and giving and contributing in whatever way I can.
I know I should be spending more time with my parents, my grandparents, my siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins, friends... learning how to best contribute. And returning the favor in any way I can.
What needs to change is me. The way I make decisions on a daily basis. How to best contribute. How to contribute at all. To Contribute. To stop wasting time.
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1 comment:
Ah, the disappearing post mystery is solved!
I totally understand where you're coming from. I have a lot of the same feelings and am just amazed that time goes by so quickly without me doing anything significant since the last time I checked. It leaves me feeling empty and, never thought of it until you put it here, but like the time that did pass has been wasted. Again, not like I don't enjoy every minute with my husband and friends. It's just weird.
Not really sure what to do about it except to keep an open heart and mind. Oh, and blame the economy. That works for everything right now ;)
Appreciate you sharing! Perhaps God will present a new path or a new way of looking at the paths we're all on.
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